Happy Mail [11/11]

Have you ever heard the saying, "Your wound or emotional trauma is not your fault, but your healing is your responsibility"?

I first heard this phrase years ago, when I was just at the beginning of my healing journey and just starting to understand the idea of what I now call 'being happy from the inside out'.

It felt empowering to be able to transform myself from within, and it also felt daunting. From being an immigrant child of parents who experienced a lot of oppression and poverty to being a very empathic and sensitive female, I knew that there were quite a few candidates for healing within my emotional world.

Can you relate? Do you sometimes feel empowered to become more of the person you're meant to be? And other times overwhelmed by all that needs to be done?

Well, I want to let you know a few things that I remind myself of as often as I need to, in hopes that these nuggets of wisdom serve your own healing, happiness, and growth in whatever way best meets your unique unfolding right now.

#1 - It's okay to ease up on the pressure.

Yes, healing is your responsibility because as an adult, you are the maker of your own life, but that doesn't mean that you need to heal by tomorrow or by next Wednesday.

Healing is a journey that you'll be on for the rest of your life. No, it won't always feel as hard as it does in the beginning and no, it won't take long for you to start seeing improvements in your life.

#2 - Being honest with ourselves is where true happiness and healing begin.

Who or what triggers you in your life, and why? A lot of our present day reactions actually come from our past experiences, so honestly observing yourself will create an opportunity for you to really get to understand the root causes of your emotional wounds.

#3 - Process your feelings about the past, as you feel ready.

As you're starting to learn or perhaps have already learned, avoiding your feelings about the past doesn't help very much. The hurt and pain just stays dormant inside you and continues affecting you.

The antidote is to actually let your feelings surface and invite yourself to feel them as sensations in your body (whether tightness in your chest, pressure in your head, etc) and to understand rather than judge them. Doing this with a coach or therapist can be so helpful, too.

#4 - Self-compassion is the language we all need yet aren't taught in school.

One of the most beneficial skills we can learn along our individual healing journey is self-compassion. As you allow your feelings about the past to surface, you'll need a lot of extra love and care. So be sure that you're tuning in to your needs and giving yourself permission to meet them as often as you can.

How to Begin to Heal From Your Emotional Trauma

In my latest blog article, I go into depth about how it is that our emotional wounds end up running our life, and what we can do to begin to heal our emotional trauma. There is a particular part of our inner world to start with and 7 steps I recommend starting with.

An invitation for you ♡ 

Think about an area of your life where you've felt stuck for a while now, whether a family or romantic relationship, a friendship, job, other commitment. What's keeping you where you are?

Once you've read the blog, think about this: how can you use a few or more of the steps to bring some awareness, understanding, and support to what you're experiencing?

Let me know what you're taking away by commenting on the blog or replying directly to this email. I always love to connect with you.